Racism and online dating

When he signed up for Ok Cupid in 2013, he was in Singapore but began using it more frequently when he moved to Portland, Ore., the following year.It was around then that he saw Ok Cupid’s data on race and attraction.Men seemingly open to dating “anyone and everyone” eventually include a “no black women” addendum. The online dating world is also stacked against black women and Asian men.Women who state they only want to find a nice, kind, man say that they have no real physical preferences … According to Christian Rudder’s OKCupid blog, stats from 2014 show that 82 per cent of non-black men on OKCupid show some bias against black women.

This feels passive aggressive to me: they see the kind of person I am/am not trying to engage with, yet they are willing to ignore my expressed wishes to fulfill their own selfish desires, which is an indirect kind of hostility and violence. But, I mean, what could I possibly know about elephants? Sometimes it’s more tiring to hold your frustration in than it is to expend energy expressing said frustration.

Here’s the thing K(ar)en, the problem isn’t the children. I don’t even see color, except for red, which is the color of the blood I previously mentioned.

The problem is: authority figures not being taught how to non-violently assess and handle non-compliance; a system set up to capitalize on the imprisonment, endangerment, and death/murder of people of color; people of color being labelled “disrespectful” and “thuggish” for challenging authority, but when non-POC do it, they’re exercising their rights; black/brownness being read as “immediate threat” and “deserving of punishmemt: regardless of behavior; militarized security gauards in schools; non-POC not batting an eye at a child being thrown to the ground, assaulted, pushed up against walls, punched until bloody, kicked in the ribs, shaken by the neck, and — I hate to be the one to tell you this, K — it’s because that child is not White. We’ve heard it all before: “Isn’t #Black Lives Matter divisive? Bob Marley said it best: let’s get together and feel alright. ” This would be where you’d drop your links and titles.

lan Montecillo logged on to Ok Cupid and started filling out his profile.

He wrote down his height (6 feet), listed his interests (podcasts, basketball, reading) and included photos of himself outdoors.

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Christian said all the dating data he'd seen fits the same pattern: In Australia, dating site RSVP does an annual study to gauge attitudes to dating. It showed while four out of five people said they would date outside our own race, only half actually had. It's a bit more complex than that, according to Denton Callandar from the Kirby Institute at the University of New South Wales.

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